AceShowbiz - Zachary Levi has opened up about his lifelong battles with anxiety and depression. When sharing his story on the "Heart of the Matter" podcast, the "Shazam!" actor admitted to using sex, drugs and alcohol to "numb" his pain before he finally sought treatment.
"I didn't realize that I was struggling with these things until I was 37, about five years ago," the 41-year-old said, according to The Hollywood Reporter. "And I had a complete mental breakdown."
Zachary claimed he felt as if he "was an embarrassment to the family. I mean, it was lots of vitriol, lots of yelling." Thus, he eventually turned to "sex or drugs or booze or things to distract me from, to numb myself from the pain that I was running away from most of my life."
"The irony is that booze can give you this temporary relief, but then the next day amplifies that anxiety tenfold," the Louisiana hunk continued. "So, then you're running back to get more, and it just becomes this vicious cycle."
Zachary divulged that he tried to escape from his problems by moving to Austin, Texas. However, things got worse and he even had a mental breakdown over where to eat. "I drove around probably for 10 minutes not knowing which place to eat because I didn't know which place was the right place to eat as opposed to just saying, 'Zach, just go eat some food,' " he recalled.
"I'm sitting in my truck, and vividly, I remember I was holding onto the wheel and I was just shaking back and forth, that like almost trying to shake myself out of what it was going on, and I'm just weeping. I'm just crying," he recounted. "I'm like, 'God, help me.' "
As he developed suicidal thoughts following the incident, the "Chuck" alum said he visited an emergency room before ending up in a psych ward. "I was having very active thoughts of ending my life," he disclosed. "It wasn't the first time I had had them. I had been in dark places in my life before, but I guess in those moments I had people around me."
"The lies are whispering into my ear," he continued. "And the failure that I felt that I was enough to be like, 'Zach, it doesn't feel like you're going to make it out of this.' "