In a candid reveal, the music producer, who is renowned for his critical eye on talent shows, shares how his 10-year-old son Eric pulled him out of a deep emotional rut following the loss of his parents.
- June 11, 2024
AceShowbiz - Simon Cowell, renowned for his critical eye on talent shows like "America's Got Talent" and "American Idol", has opened up about his profoundly dark period following the deaths of his parents Eric and Julie Cowell in 1999 and 2015, respectively.
Speaking on the "The Diary of a CEO" podcast, Cowell poignantly recalled, "When I lost my mum, I was on a downward spiral at that point. I lost everyone, you know, I've lost my parents. It's finality now. What I said about the material things I've got, everything just meant nothing at that point."
Struggling with overwhelming grief, Cowell turned into a "ridiculous workaholic" to cope. "I would work through until 7 or 8 in the morning. I would wake up at 2 or 3 in the afternoon and I actually got addicted to that kind of lifestyle. I just loved the intensity," he admitted. Despite his professional successes, contentment remained elusive. He confessed, "I wasn't happy, I really, really wasn't happy."
However, a turning point came when his fiancee, Lauren Silverman, called with life-changing news. Reflecting on the moment, Cowell recounted, "When I got the call from Lauren, which starts, any call that starts with, 'Are you sitting down?' You know what's coming next. And she told me. And yes it did absolutely change, it changed everything in my life. It made me happy again."
The birth of their son, Eric, in 2014 marked the beginning of Cowell's healing process. Eric, who is named after Cowell's father, breathed new life into the TV personality's world. "For me, it was perfect because like we were talking earlier about our childhoods, it was brilliant. Fantastic. I remember the first time I watched 'The Jungle Book' with him, and I'm looking over and seeing the joy he had watching that movie," Cowell reminisced.
Cowell emphasized that Eric "without question" saved him from his darkest times. "I really, really had reached the point where nothing mattered," he said. "The hardest thing also was being on television as well ... I felt like a clown here because I'm dying inside."
Recollecting his emotional turmoil, Cowell admitted, "The whole time was dark. I can absolutely relate to when people reach the lowest levels you possibly can, where essentially being alive doesn't matter anymore, because you just go, 'Well, what have I got to live for?' "
