AceShowbiz - Elle Macpherson, the iconic Australian supermodel, has not had an easy ride. In her forthcoming memoir, "Elle: Life, Lessons, and Learning to Trust Yourself," she pulls back the curtains on her past struggles with alcohol addiction, a chapter in her life that was far from the glitz and glamour usually associated with her name.

Macpherson reveals how she used to force herself to throw up after drinking vodka every night, trying to maintain a facade of control while her life was falling apart.

During a recent appearance on the Carrie and Tommy radio show, she said, "I didn't keep it hidden, it was just a function of my life." With her then-husband Arpad Busson often away, Macpherson found herself alone with her two sons, now aged 26 and 21, and resorted to alcohol for some semblance of peace. "I used to think if I throw up I wouldn't have the alcohol in my system. How bonkers is that?" she reflected.

Her story is a sobering reminder that no amount of external control can replace the need for inner peace. "And ultimately I realized there is nothing outside myself, no people, place or thing, no behavior or habit, that can replace the feeling of inner peace," Macpherson noted. This realization set her on a path to self-discovery and healing.

Macpherson's first foray into Alcoholics Anonymous was a pivotal moment, offering her the connection she desperately needed. "I felt quite disconnected... AA is a wonderful community of connections," she explained. Sharing her story in such a supportive environment was a critical step toward reclaiming her life.

In her memoir, she also reveals her battle with breast cancer, diagnosed seven years ago, which she faced with a holistic approach despite the strong recommendations from 32 doctors to undergo chemotherapy. "Saying no to standard medical solutions was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life," Macpherson shared.

She doubled down on her decision to forgo chemotherapy in a television interview, which was described as "difficult" and "tense" by journalist.

Now marking 20 years of sobriety, Macpherson states, "Everybody has their own journey and I'm not interested in telling other people what to do but I know that this was a decision that I've never regretted." She emphasizes that wellness and presence in one's life cannot coexist with the numbing effects of alcohol.

Elle Macpherson's inspiring journey is a powerful testament to the strength it takes to confront one's demons and the peace that comes from authentic, inner healing.