As she prepares for her second run as the Grammy Awards host, the 'Girl on Fire' hitmaker looks back at the start of her career, describing herself as the epitome of 'fake it till you make it.'

• Dec 6, 2019

AceShowbiz - Alicia Keys was embarrassed after walking away with five Grammy Awards at the start of her career in 2002.

The singer enjoyed a break-out year and picked up top honours, including Song of the Year for "Fallin'" and the Best New Artist trophy at the ceremony, but as she prepares to host the Grammys for a second year, she recalls the unbelievable experience was a little "strange."

"I remember being embarrassed that my name was called so many times," she tells Billboard. "It was strange because here is my biggest dream, and I was like, 'I'm from Hell's Kitchen (New York). I can't even speak right. What am I doing here?' And then this unbelievably magical night culminated in validation."

"You know that foggy, sick, head-cold feeling? That, mixed with the exhilaration. The entire year, I was hanging on for dear life. I was the epitome of 'fake it till you make it.' "

The experience shaped her preparations to host of the ceremony this year and she's recalling the magical night as she makes plans for next year's big event, revealing she wants to make it a "lovefest."

"I know what I normally feel in that room, which is left out and a little bit uncomfortable," she adds. "I wanted to create this lovefest, where we could celebrate each other's greatness and just have fun."

"We're all trying to make our way through a very chaotic time, and we all just need a little celebration - to feel like we're with friends, like somebody actually cares."

The 2020 Grammy Awards will take place on 26 January (20).