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Nicole Scherzinger Talks About Her 'Miserable' and 'Dark' Past When Struggling With Bulimia

July 2, 2014, 9:10 am GMT

The former Pussycat Dolls member opened up about her battle with bulimia when her girl group was at the height of fame, saying, 'It is such a horrible, paralyzing disease.'



Nicole Scherzinger recently talked about her battle with bulimia in an interview with U.K.'s Cosmopolitan's August issue. Nicole revealed that she struggled with eating disorder for eight years during her time with The Pussycat Dolls.

Nicole first revealed her battle with bulimia in 2012. The 36-year-old singer admitted that it was still difficult for her to talk about her long-secret of eating disorder. "[Opening up about bulimia] was hard for me to speak about. It still is hard, and thinking about it I try not to well up," said the "Don't Cha" singer, "It is such a horrible paralyzing disease and it was such a dark time for me."

She continued, "I didn't think anyone knew in my group or in my family because I hid it that well. I knew it wasn't normal or healthy because I was hurting myself through this cycle of disordered eating. It was my drug, my addiction. It's an endless vicious cycle."

The brunette beauty told the magazine that she sought help after she passed out during a tour. "I had started losing my voice, I couldn't sing at shows, and then I remember my manager finding me passed out on the floor in Malta or in the south of France," Nicole recalled.

"I thought, 'I'm going to lose everything I love if I don't love myself.' I had such a great life on the outside, the (Pussycat) Dolls were on top of the world but I was miserable on the inside," she added, "I'm never letting that happen again; you only get one life."

Nicole said that she decided to open up about her eating disorder to help other people who had the same situation like her. "You can recover and you can get rid of it forever. I did it and that's why it's so important for me to share my story. Do not give up because you're so special and you're meant for such great things," the "Jai Ho! (You Are My Destiny)" singer said.

The former judge of "The X Factor" also talked about her relationship with Formula 1 racer Lewis Hamilton. She claimed, "Well it's something crazy romantic. Relationships are hard and having to hold a long-distance relationship is even harder. It's kudos to us for growing and trying - there's so much love there. But I'm good and I'm happy."

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